My whole relationship summed up
He called again today to enquire as to how I was doing. He wanted to come over and assist me with the housework, because that was what I was doing. I declined his offer.
He was adamant that he wanted to come over, so I agreed to him coming over as there were a number of things I needed to discuss with him.
Overnight I had worked out the split of the finances and had to run through them with him. I had it all clearly written out, the liabilities etc etc. He really has no idea of any of the financial stuff as it has always been my job to sort out.
Anyway, I had it clearly set out as to what I was entitled to as far as Child Support payments and what his share of the liabilities would be. I advised him of the fortnightly total and he was quite happy with this and considered it to be a fair arrangement.
I then suggested that I would transfer the payment to my account each fortnight and that if he wanted I could make his credit card payments for him whilst logged on to his account. Again, he was more than happy with this.
Discussion over....finances arranged. Done and dusted. Simple really!
He then looked at me and surprised me by saying "You're serious aren't you?"
I raised the paper and replied, "It's all there, written in blue ink on white paper for you to see."
He looked at me with despair in his eyes and responded. "I never thought it would come to this."
In that sentence my husband summed up my whole entire relationship. He never thought it would come to this because he always took me for granted. He always thought that I would take him back. Never before have I sat down and split the finances.
The last two years he has developed the attitude of "Leave her be. She is just in a bad mood. She'll be fine tomorrow", which has been one of the main issues in our marriage. His failure to address issues have resulted in this marriage dissolving.
I think he finally realised that I am not getting over this one. His marriage was summed up by a $ value. I bet that was an awesome feeling.
He was adamant that he wanted to come over, so I agreed to him coming over as there were a number of things I needed to discuss with him.
Overnight I had worked out the split of the finances and had to run through them with him. I had it all clearly written out, the liabilities etc etc. He really has no idea of any of the financial stuff as it has always been my job to sort out.
Anyway, I had it clearly set out as to what I was entitled to as far as Child Support payments and what his share of the liabilities would be. I advised him of the fortnightly total and he was quite happy with this and considered it to be a fair arrangement.
I then suggested that I would transfer the payment to my account each fortnight and that if he wanted I could make his credit card payments for him whilst logged on to his account. Again, he was more than happy with this.
Discussion over....finances arranged. Done and dusted. Simple really!
He then looked at me and surprised me by saying "You're serious aren't you?"
I raised the paper and replied, "It's all there, written in blue ink on white paper for you to see."
He looked at me with despair in his eyes and responded. "I never thought it would come to this."
In that sentence my husband summed up my whole entire relationship. He never thought it would come to this because he always took me for granted. He always thought that I would take him back. Never before have I sat down and split the finances.
The last two years he has developed the attitude of "Leave her be. She is just in a bad mood. She'll be fine tomorrow", which has been one of the main issues in our marriage. His failure to address issues have resulted in this marriage dissolving.
I think he finally realised that I am not getting over this one. His marriage was summed up by a $ value. I bet that was an awesome feeling.
posted by kissmekate at 1:01 am
1 Comments:
Congratulations! I knew you could do it... do you feel somewhat relieved and powerful? Because there will be weak moments.. keep remembering the powerful feeling and you'll get thru it. By the way... where is 'he' living? Is the Mistress still around? How old are your children... you don't say much about them. FYI... I live way up in Toronto (Canada) and found your blog accidentally... glad I did.
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