Sunday, August 27, 2006

Mistress sends a bill for 'services rendered'

The day my husband told me of his affair I called the mistress. My husband gave me her number but she refuses to believe this. She really did not want to speak to me so she called me a lunatic and hung up on me.

Later that night, when she knew my husband was out at a weekly engagement, she rang my home number. I was blown away, but I guess now she wanted to speak to me because it was on her terms. She called to tell me that my husband had called her and ended their relationship. The conversation went something like this :

Mistress X : "Is that Jane"

Jane : "Yeah it tis"

Mistress X : "It's Mistress X"

Jane : "How the hell did you get this number?"

Mistress X : "Oh don't worry I am not going to stalk you. I just called to tell you that John has ended our relationship."

Well 'not going to stalk you' took on a whole new meaning! I'd hate to see what she would do if she was going to stalk me based on her 'not going to stalk you' behaviour and actions!

Jane : "Yes I already know."

Mistress X : "Well you should know because you're his wife. I just called to say that I am out of your life and to wish you well. Look after him because I love him."

and then Mistress X abruptly hung up on Jane.

Well knock me down with a feather! She has finally worked out that he is married to me! I am so happy that she loves my husband and I so wanted to hear this from her!

Jane wanted to speak to Mistress X so called her back. And funnily enough Mistress X did not answer. Of course she was never going to answer because she was too gutless and it was no longer on her terms.

Jane called again.....still no answer so Jane left a message saying that she wanted to talk to her and that it wasn't about revenge and just asked her to call.

Mistress X sent a text message to Jane's mobile phone that said :

"There is no point in us talking. Consider me out of your life and look after him he deserves it. dont call me again and don't ever threaten me again"

Jane replied via text message :

"All I wanted to say was I appreciate the way you have stated you will leave us alone. We have both treated each other very poorly. I do love him and know that there is a huge amount of hurt on both sides. I know it is a long road ahead but I also know based on what we had we can make it work. He has been very honest to me about your affair but there is a hell of a lot he would not have told you about us. Please dont judge me on what you know as it is nowhere near enough of the picture. Ur affair will only bring John and I closer together so for that I thank u. And for the record I have never threatened you"

Now, my friends have asked me how I could be so nice. I did not hate Mistress X, and in fact still don't. I honestly meant what I said in my message...that I appreciated the way she said she was out of our lives and was going to leave us alone. I guess believing her was a big mistake, afterall she was so used to living a life of lies. What was one more?

But I have to say the response I got back floored me and probably tells alot about her character.
Mistress X responded :

"so glad I could be of assistance. I will send my bill for services rendered. the call is taped you threatened me. our family here suffers now leave us b"

What exactly is she saying here? With a statement such as "I will send my bill for services rendered" one can only deduce one thing from that. I only hope she has a permit and pays tax on her earnings.

Jane responded : "U R a real charmer"

Mistress X responded : "why thank you john always thought so"

Jane responded : "And who won?"

Mistress X responded : "you did jane and I honestly wish you well. i dont hate you. in fact i feel pity for you. all the best. are we done?"

I am so relieved that she doesn't hate me. I could not sleep at night knowing that she hated me. Of course she has reason to hate me doesn't she? I screwed her husband. Oh, no, hang on, it was the other way around! She screwed MY husband!

Perhaps I should send HER the account for my husband's medical tests to clear him from sexually transmitted infections!


Blogger SolarisGal said...

makes me sick. Why is it that us cheated wives have to be seen as some kind of stalker/ sicko /pscyho?

At least the mistress admitted that she had an affair with your husband- she didn't have to do that - but she's an idiot for calling and text messsaging you.
Your lawyer/solicitor can very easily subpoena those records - as in my case.

If you should ever go down the path of divorce, you should have her email and text message accounts subpoenaed - ask your lawyer/solicitor to do it for the time that her and your husband were having the affair. Watch how wide their eyes will open.

Sun Aug 27, 02:10:00 am AEST  
Anonymous enter sandman said...

Very goood idea getting him tested for std's, sleep with dogs pick up flee's etc...
Mistress sounds like a complete LUNATIC !!! but do they come any other way? I did call mrs football hero's wife a dog in a lift once but that's the closest I ever got.

Sun Aug 27, 09:15:00 am AEST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please don't put yourself through this S*** any longer, this is breaking my heart. Put your hands in the air and just get out of there. You deserve better, you are a beautiful soul, find someone who loves you and cherishes you and wants you for all time. It is time to move one.

Mon Aug 28, 07:30:00 pm AEST  
Blogger S* said...

I still don't understand (and probably never will) why the two of you ended up battling the way you did. You both should have been giving "Husband" hell! Afterall, he made false promises and told lies to BOTH of you. It's not like Mistress had a false one-sided relationship. Husband played his part.

And Shattered...I think the last comment was SO BENEATH you. You've been rising above, so why stop now? Just because a woman has an affair doesn't mean she's a dirty person. BOTH she and Husband did something most people consider immoral. That's like how a woman can sleep with the same number of people a man does, but she gets called a whore and the man doesn't.

Tue Aug 29, 12:03:00 am AEST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not sure I understand why you are even texting her and sharing your inner feelings.

Tue Aug 29, 12:16:00 am AEST  
Blogger Russ said...

Pardon the intrusion. It makes me heartsick to read your story and I don't even know you. I always worry about this on some level or another because my wife cheated on her ex years before her and I met. I rememeber her in a candid moment, I believe we were watching divorce court or something and she blurted out about the guy on the screen, "Once a cheater, always a cheater." When I called her on that, reminding her of what she said her past was, she said, "Oh, but not with you honey" That has stayed with me for a while. I'm not sure what to tell you about whether he's worth keeping. I don't know your complete situation but I'd be hard pressed to keep my wife if she strayed on me.
Good luck to you.

Tue Aug 29, 08:29:00 am AEST  
Blogger shattered said...

S* it is you and I both that will never understand. I did not battle but the mistress treated me like I was the enemy. Afterall, she was the one that hacked into my blog account, my email account, sent me numerous emails from her 'friends' called my house at all hours of the day and night and had a revolting blog site that was nasty and vindictive. She was the one that chose to continue to pursue my husband with emails stating she wanted to kiss him, even after he was back with me.

And during all of this what did I do? I can hold my head high KNOWING that I never did a thing to her. Why would I? As I have stated I do not hate her because as you clearly said it wsa not her that told me lies and broke promises. I have never lost that perspective and my husband pays for that. He does not live with me under my roof and has a lot of ground to cover before I even consider having him back in my life full time. I don't think the mistress has ever had this concept and still blames me for the fact that she is not with him.

As far as the comment in relation to sexually transmitted infections, my husband invited a third person into my marriage and I am making sure that nothing else enters my life. I have a right to protect myself and if I met someone else tomorrow I would be sending them off for the necessary tests. I have a right to protect myself and just because you believe that the person is a 'nice' person does not mean they are free from infection.

Tue Aug 29, 09:16:00 am AEST  
Blogger shattered said...

Anonymous I never intended to enter into a text fest. It was only ever going to be a one off. I think reading my responses shows that I really was not interested in getting involved with her in anyway.

The tone in the messages sent from both parties tells me a lot. She was angry from word go with me, but I wasn't angry with her. I could have retaliated but for what purpose?

Tue Aug 29, 09:19:00 am AEST  
Blogger shattered said...

Russ - sorry to burst your bubble, but guess what? I am not my husband's first wife and he has done exactly the same thing in his previous marriages.

I was told the same thing as you have been told...I could never play up on you, I am older and wiser now, I love you too much.

This to me indicates some underlying issues and unless my husband seeks professional help I am not interested in going back. To this stage he has not picked up the phone to make the appointment.

So Russ please do not look at this through rose coloured glasses. My marriage is living proof for you that they can and will cheat.

Tue Aug 29, 09:23:00 am AEST  
Anonymous enter sandman said...

I think you have every right to post and blog whatever you want shattered, seems interesting someone who has never met you hubby or mistress seems to believe mistress over the victim. That in itself says a lot about thier morales too. Sorry to sound nasty but if someone is going to have a go at you they can add me to their list too mate XXX

Tue Aug 29, 10:25:00 am AEST  
Blogger SolarisGal said...

I used to be one of those people who used to say, "Blame the husband, not the mistress for cheating". That is until it happened to me, and I was able to see things from a different perspective, which other inexperienced people looking in from the outside would normally not.
Like the bait for the husband that the mistress used to seduce him, as one example.

Why should shattered take arms together with the mistress against the husband? The mistress chose to sleep with the husband - she could have avoided this whole thing -she's grown up, she's perfectly capable of making her own decisions - and I'm sure that she knew that it was wrong to sleep with a married man.

So sometimes, unless one goes through an experience, they really are not in the position to say. It's all very painful and extremely shocking - enough to cause you to think and do things you otherwise wouldn't do and or say.

Now, shattered,
Do you remember the day that you found out your husband had an affair - the sickening feeling? Well, I can tell you straight out that the divorce process is 110% more painful than that dreaded day when you found out that your husband had an affair. I dont know why - can't pinpoint it, but it really is a lot more painful.

Personally, I would avoid it at all cost. Perhaps you may want to seperate to create an "absence makes the heart grow fonder" kind of environment - I don't know. The problem with seperation, though, is that the mistress might "profit" from that opportunity - if you know what I mean. She might even go as far as saying, "Look see, your wife doens't love you, but I do - come to me". You know how mistresses are - once they eye your husband they convince the husband what a horrendous person the wife is.

But it's all up to you...

Tue Aug 29, 02:40:00 pm AEST  
Blogger S* said...

To the previous commenters...It's not a matter of believing mistress over wife. Trust me, I know WAY MORE than I want to about this situation...firsthand from both parties (I've seen emails, know details of the legal proceedings, etc.). I have said all along that being with a married man is WRONG WRONG WRONG. But people are human and sometimes the desire to be loved can make someone lose their senses. Plus, it's not just about the mistress going after a married's about a married man going after a woman who is not his wife. And I'm not saying Shattered and Mistress should join forces (that's preposterous)...just don't put all the blame on the mistress. I'm quite sure that the mistress didn't rip off Husband's clothes and force him to do things against his will. He was a WILLING participant. And as I said before HUSBAND was the one who promised to be faithful to Shattered, not Mistress. That's why I think the anger should be directed toward the Husband. Yes, you can say "she screwed MY husband" but "YOUR husband screwed HER" and I don't see him taking the necessary steps to preserve your marriage. Otherwise, why would you be so brokenhearted?

But I main concern is Shattered and her healing and doing what is best for her. She didn't deserve to be cheated on and she doesn't deserve this heartache she's going through.

And I didn't mean that you shouldn't make sure you didn't catch anything.

Tue Aug 29, 11:45:00 pm AEST  
Blogger SolarisGal said...

Everyone has a desire to feel loved. And lust is anything but love. The mistress and husband always claim each other as true love partners who understand each other better than the wife would. But remove the surface and you'd find one emotionally immature woman and a man seeking sexual indulgement. And this is always the case, because if shattered's husband really loved the mistress, why isn't he with her? Because that affair was based on lust.

Yes, the husband acted in a way which was deviously emotionally and psychologically abusive of his wife, BUT the mistress' involvement shows that she herself not only lacks personal integrity, but shares the same "crafty and devious" behavior as a person who steals. Just like a bank robber has a genuine need for cash, so the mistress has a genuine need for "love".

If the mistress really liked the married man, she wouldn't compromise his marriage, family or integrity, but would resist the relationship so that the husband could choose how to deal with his marriage - without the aggravations imposed by an affair, and in this case, her "followup" psychotic behavior displayed thru hackings,nasty blog sites and only God knows what else.

Wed Aug 30, 01:05:00 pm AEST  

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